Thursday, March 7, 2013

What if we just put all of your sh%# outside?

We're building a playhouse!!! Actually we're building a shed, but we're going to make it pretty :)

We were at the Costco and saw a shed that my daughter thought was a house. She said "I would live in that house" and I thought "Really? You will? Don't toy with me child! We could put all your crap outside and maybe my house would finally stay clean for once" then that same day a friend of mine posted this cute pic on facebook

When I saw this fairy tale oasis I realized that with this picture I could maybe talk my five year old in to moving out for the summer. Oh come on! Having a five year old is like having a hobo. She smells funny, she never bathes or changes her clothes, conversation is nothing but incoherent rambling. Her only objective in life is to get more candy. She doesn't care about food and shelter she just wants that sugar high. Plus, didn't you ever camp out in the back yard? It was good healthy fun. So I'm just asking her to camp out in the back yard..... for a fortnight.  It sounds strange but we're talking about a very eccentric child. Look at her:

Who takes an eye test in fur? And don't look at me I don't dress this child like Kid Rock, that's all her. She did fail that eye test....... I just realized she may not even know how fabulous she looks. I'll tell ya who dresses like this, the kind of kid that lives down by the river in a shed. Except there is no river and her shed is going to be shabby chic. Plus I'm letting her take all of her friends. Even that bird she named Kitty.

I'll give you  reasons G-Dilly should move out
1. Ummm, She wants to. You heard what she said in the Costco.
2. The kids really want to get a dog and this would be like practicing
3. When I saw Secret Garden as a little girl I dreamt of the day I would have my very own crazy person living in my attic/basement/backyard. In fact I was so disappointed in that movie when it turned out to be a cripple. I was really hoping for a crazy person.
4. It would be nice to have a neighbor I liked
5. If you think of the shed as our vacation home, it makes us sound really elite
6. We're gonna name it Xanadu 2 and our first Xanadu was wildly successful
7. Think of the college application "Owned my first home at 5" Hello Harvard
8. She can have me over for tea and I can scribble all over her wall. REVENGE IS MINE!!
9. The baby of the family is the most dependent and often even in adulthood never leaves the nest, having her start practicing now may break that curse.
10. This worked out really well for Snow White

There is one problem though. I'll miss waking up like this:


  1. This post is totally adorable! I clicked on the link originally because I read the words sh%# and Costco, and thought to myself, I thought, "this gal is right up my ally". Thanks for the laugh!